i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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