he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
