whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I want you more than these girls want KFC
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
3pm strippers are depressing
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
