You're a womanizer and a bitch.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
39 Memes Anyone Who Cries When They See Their Bank Account Will Relate To
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I have aggressive nipples.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Randomize
