wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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