Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
