in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Randomize
