Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize