Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Randomize
