Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Hippo gnu deer
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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