I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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