are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
50% drunk capacity currently
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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