Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
