I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
