end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
