I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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