Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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