i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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