Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
