I just made out with a guy for $7.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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