I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
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