help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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