Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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