words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
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