He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
