"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
My nipple is on Facebook.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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