does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.