made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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