when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
