can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
