Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
