So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
