he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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