next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize