he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
