he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
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The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
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He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
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