I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
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