Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear

  (1-847): View more from Illinois

  Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat

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  (847): You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear (1-847): Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat http://tfl.nu/fogp
  Replies (2) Good night (1617) Bad night (641)
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  (310): View more from California

  I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.

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  (310): I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today. http://tfl.nu/yukz
  Replies (8) Good night (5253) Bad night (688)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.

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  (214): I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome. http://tfl.nu/zhmd
  Replies (40) Good night (3563) Bad night (1252)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...

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  (208): this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer... http://tfl.nu/pqdq
  Replies (16) Good night (1034) Bad night (3127)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.

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  (727): If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends. http://tfl.nu/hu0f
  Replies (25) Good night (479) Bad night (3381)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often

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  (314): this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often http://tfl.nu/vudy
  Replies (17) Good night (3800) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.

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  (610): Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots. http://tfl.nu/yy52
  Replies (75) Good night (1407) Bad night (6224)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.

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  (814): i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof. http://tfl.nu/24gw
  Replies (16) Good night (1109) Bad night (4820)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.

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  (903): I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again. http://tfl.nu/pun6
  Replies (39) Good night (4363) Bad night (925)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.

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  (443): I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings. http://tfl.nu/mygm
  Replies (6) Good night (1653) Bad night (690)
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  (537): View more from

  I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.

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  (537): I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby. http://tfl.nu/uudp
  Replies (8) Good night (1831) Bad night (498)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.

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  (309): she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me. (708): Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you. http://tfl.nu/his2
  Replies (3) Good night (2620) Bad night (503)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".

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  (972): We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away". http://tfl.nu/ker4
  Replies (1) Good night (973) Bad night (454)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.

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  (740): Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon. http://tfl.nu/2uoq
  Replies (8) Good night (447) Bad night (858)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.

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  (570): If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit. (1-570): As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no. http://tfl.nu/hlm9
  Replies (4) Good night (1177) Bad night (362)

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