i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
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thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
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Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked