McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
A bitchslap is in order.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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