member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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