he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
