Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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