considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
