STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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