He is such a slut. More and more my type.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
