I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
