i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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