"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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