you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
that is very illegal...i love you.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
