Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I need to align my fucking chakras
soo... how was my night?
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